Okay, we think a lot of people are going to sympathize with, if not flat-out celebrate, the unnamed hero of our lead story today: the unnamed Mickey Mantle-slash-Judge Dredd who drove off a pair of burglars with a Louisville Slugger (well, some type of bat, anyway.) That's a new way of defining "neighborhood watch!"

Less-desirable neighbors are the ones who drive cars into churches, although we understand that at the age of 95, the fellow may not be entirely to blame. Thankfully, no one was hurt save himself, and those injuries fairly minor. Still, the photo of the damage is something to see.

Check out any or all of the following:

Elmhurst—Neighbor Chases Would-be Burglars with Baseball Bat—Two men attempted to break into a home in Elmhurst, but were chased off by an alert neighbor wielding a baseball bat.

Glen Ellyn—Motorist Drives Through Grace Lutheran Church—A 95-year-old man drove through the vestibule area of the church, suffering minor injuries; no one else was harmed.

Burr Ridge—Man Who Pleaded Guilty to Shooting at Motorist Takes His Own Life—The attorney of John C. Kavan said that his client, who pleaded guilty earlier this month to a felony gun charge, was "despondent" about the case.

Lisle—Lisle-Based Business at Root of Cook County Bribery Scheme—Two former Cook County officials are facing federal charges for pressuring hospitals to purchase products from a veterans-owned business in Lisle.

Wheaton—Lombard Man Gets 38 Years for Child Sexual Assault—A Lombard man was sentenced Wednesday to 38 years in prison for repeatedly sexually assaulting a child in his care.

Batavia—'Subway Robber' From Batavia Pleads Guilty to 3 Counts of Armed Robbery—Douglas E. Kelley, 27, last known address of the 1100 block of Lorlyn Circle, Batavia, agreed Friday, June 29 with the Kane County State's Attorney to a sentence of 20 years in the Illinois Department of Corrections. 

La Grange/La Grange Park—Nazareth Academy Teacher Presumed Drowned After Jumping in Lake Near Anitoch—Police called off the search for a missing Nazareth Academy teacher at 3:30 p.m. on Friday, but said they would resume the search Saturday.

Hinsdale/Clarendon Hills—Hinsdale Central Grad Danny Thomson Competes at Olympic Swimming Trials—The former Red Devil finished 35th in the 400-meter freestyle and will compete this weekend in the 1,500-meter freestyle event.

Oak Park/River Forest—Fire Damages Berwyn's Autre Monde—A fire broke out at popular destination restaurant on Roosevelt Road.

Geneva—'KONY 2012' Stencil on Geneva Water Well Protests Ugandan War Criminal—A stenciled "KONY 2012" on a Geneva well control panel is "criminal defacement of property" on the Geneva police blotter, but it's also a worldwide social protest against murder, rape and torture in Africa.

Western Springs—Ogden Avenue Crosswalk Signals Are Live: What to Know—The improved system for crossing Ogden Avenue to Bemis Woods is finally complete and open to public use; here’s what pedestrians, bikers and motorists should be aware of.

St. Charles—Dry Conditions Put Fireworks Display in Jeopardy—Excessively dry conditions across St. Charles and the region may force the St. Charles Parks District to cancel the annual Independence Day fireworks display.

Downers Grove—Local 'Mob Wives Chicago' Star Finds Opportunity Through Reality TV—Downers Grove resident Christina Scoleri found being a cast member on 'Mob Wives Chicago' gave her an opportunity to find her footing while going through a divorce.